CRACKHOUSE FAMILY IN CRISIS AS 'PARASITIC TWIN' REGAINS CONTROL OVER AMY.
It has been reported by 'pop insiders' that 'troubled' pop star AMY DOSSHOUSE has been caught up in trouble again after the operation to remove her conjoined parasitic twin/head that went 'ahead' during last autumn hasn't been the success that AMY'S family and record company had hoped it would be.
TEN BAG!?
The trouble started again in earnest a few weeks ago when the parasitic twin on the back of the 'back to black' star's head had supposedly been 'removed'. Despite undergoing a sixteen hour operation to have her 'twin' underdeveloped deformed lump of sentient flesh removed, it seems that the operation wasn't the success that was hoped and it seems that now, judging by ms dosshouse's behaviour that the twin wasn't totally removed as thought and instead it has swiftly grown back and has managed to recover control over AMY'S mind and body and has taken it upon itself a self destructive course of "if i cant have a normal life then nor can she".
MANGLED LUMP OF FLESH WITH BITS OF HAIR AND TEETH?
According to one of AMY'S 'insider's', ever since her 'twin' forced her to grow back her trademark 'beehive' hairstyle so that it can hide during public engagements while still directing AMY'S movements, The 'twin' has become even more bitter and controlling and trusts AMY about as far as it can scream through its dribbling deformed mouth that has teeth that stick out a various angles and bits of wispy hair! Its one fully formed top lip has reduced it to whispering ego destroying put downs into AMY'S ear it has been alleged, another fraught 'insider' from the AMY camp said that " if she doesn't get to Switzerland and get to a plastic surgery clinic soon, then the 'twin' (who the family have dubbed 'the poison face') could take AMY over fully and if you think the occasional ordeals it forces AMY through is bad now, then what the 'head' has in store would make AMY'S recent behaviour look like a nice girls tea party".
LICK UP DA ROCK INNIT!!!!
Already in one week the 'twin' has been able to fill its craving for drugs into AMY'S mind, and the 'twin/head' has been able to take control of her mind to the extent that its need for drugs was strong enough to turn AMY into a drug lusting beast in public, forcing her to famously scream in a public bar "i am a legend, get these people out of here i want to take drugs".
LAMPPOST!
Of course now that AMY'S loose stools have hit the fan, the fingers of blame have been pointed at anyone by everyone, all close aides and friends have started to blame each other now that she looks close to an early grave, yet none of them seem to think that by not over ruling AMY in favour of the 'twin' with its stronger 'wild party personality' they were doing any wrong. But sadly for AMY it looks like her body cant keep up with the 'twins' evil appetite, which mostly stays under the cover of the 'bee-hive' what with it being shy in front of cameras as well as being scared of what would happen if the general public were to see it, and because of sunburn, and its suction padded stumpy appendages tapping into AMY'S head.
BUCKET!!
AMY'S family seem to have had enough and are worried that they may be seeing their daughter heading into an early grave and that the 'twin' has started to hot wire itself into AMY'S brain for good. And it is feared that the 'head' is seeking to bring down AMY in much the same way AMY tried to leave it in a bucket after the recent operation to become removed from each other.
The amazingly fast regrowth of the 'twin', who appears to have retained all of its pre-op memories has also had Friends and family worried because of its unpredictability, and of course it's bottomless need for drugs. Some say that not having an independent 'solo' body weakens the effects of drug's, leaving 'twin' and host frequently needing more. What with there being two to feed in one body, that being the supposed reason for AMY'S frail look of late.
WATNEYS BREWERY!!
In one desperate measure rumoured AMY'S father MR 'WATNEY FREEHOUSE', said that MR FREEHOUSE is considering having AMY placed in a secure hospital where AMY could finally have her 'twin' removed for good and hopefully as long as there isn't any complications AMY could be 're-educated' and the years of mind control that the parasite head had been filling her brain with can be reversed.
BASKET CASE?!
Previously, Amy has had to cancel a tour of north America so that the 'rehab' star could undergo the op and follow up treatment. It didn't work then!!! Can it work this time??? We at ZERO HOUR wish MS CACKHOUSE and her partly former sibling can be both finally separated without serious injury to both, although once the 'twin' has been removed the likely hood of someone wanting to foster a pinky blob with malformed teeth, bad smell, wispy hair and a bad temper is doubtful, leading to speculation that it may stalk AMY if it isn't settled into a loving home quickly.
Rumours have also started to do the rounds saying that "should the parasitic twin live though the operation from the back of AMY'S head, and this time permanently, then the 'twin' will be entering into talks with record labels that have been showing an interest in its brand of MOTLEY KREW style 'dirty rock'n'roll " and a publisher is said to be negotiating a five digit deal to hear all the juicy titbits that it espied while hidden away on AMY'S head in the nylon 'beehive' wig. This cant be good news to AMY who, after the 'op' will want to just forget the past and get on with her life without a baby 'Davros' growing on the back of her head, tugging it back making her pull a funny face.
MUCCA.................
........The parasitic head who is represented by the same publicist as HEATHER MUCCA MILLS said in a statement read out yesterday that "all i want is most of AMY'S money so i can go out and buy a Dalek style suit to run around town in, and i am willing to put her in hospital to get it, whats wrong with that?"........................
........reuters..............reuters........reuters.........reuters......reuters..........ruters................reuters..........
No comments:
Post a Comment