summer nights

"THOSE SUM-UMER NI-HITES", "tell me more, tell me mor-or-ooooore".
Greetings, i know how grey your lives have been since ZERO HOUR
hasn't been publishing its deep badly spelt words of prose, but all that is at an end for now because...we are back (for today at least).
And what a veritable smorgasbord of irrelevance we have for you!
The reason for the prolonged silence is because the gods have decided to flash the sun at this septic isle, and anyone who knows this countries poxy weather history will know that summer has been known to last the whole of two weeks in the past and so it is best to go out and grab as many rays as possible coz' you never know if it will be back again tomorrow and so i have taken to my 'iron horse' and have been cycling as much as possible while it was nice (enough of the bloody weather already).
Apart from the roasting i have been giving my pasty body i also have some live music 'news', gig wise i was going to go and watch the mighty (and shambolic) JOHNNY MOPED at the 100 club but... and I'm still kicking myself over this, i forgot!
I woke up the morning after the gig and the first thing that entered my mind was the fact that i had missed the gig, to say that i was unhappy with myself would be an understatement, a short period of self loathing would be nearer to how i felt, and it wasn't the first time i have done this -oh no, some time ago i missed a gig by the second rate 1977 bands LONDON and THE SALFORD JETS. (yes i know all the bands so far mentioned are throwbacks from the dim past of yesteryear but most groups today just don't have that 'rough' sound that i like, today's bands try too much i think).
An so to console myself i decided to see if could find any JOHNNY MOPED on YOUTUBE, and what a delight i got, not only was there two short video clips from the gig i missed, there was also a video of MR MOPED himself AND his lovely wife (looking blind drunk) singing an old MOPED ditty in the beer garden of a pub, and they were accompanied by legendary MOPED guitarist MR STINKY TOAD himself on acoustic guitar (MOPED unplugged!).
And while i was looking at the clip i noticed that it was posted by non other than CAPTAIN SENSIBLE who has been busy (ish) posting up video's of his trainspotting passion, yes, CAPTAIN SENSIBLE is a train spotter!!!!! i must admit i was a wee bit surprised at first, but once i had thought about it i decided that it is just the kind of thing SENSIBLE would be into and wasn't out of character for him, if you wish to watch SENSIBLE trainspotting or going hiking on Ilkley moor then tune into YOUTUBE and type in 'TVSMRHAPPYTALK' and you will find all of SENSIBLES video clips including that awful breakfast cereal advert that he did in the early 1980's.
Not only that there is a video clip from the JOHNNY MOPED gig that i missed, sadly the two MOPED vids are both less than a minute each which a bit of a bugger. But just to remind myself what a gloriously rough gig i missed i have put up a MOPED clip from a gig in brighton last november, (the song is called 'incendiary device.)
Moving away from music, i have been following the tabloids because they have been following that unbelievable story about that evil fucker who locked up his daughter for 24 years in a cellar so that he could rape her at is leisure, the mad bastard even had the nerve to blame ADOLF HITLER for his evil crimes , ADOLF was even the given reason for the freak fancying his own mum! i now that ADOLF can be blamed fair and square for a lot of not nice things but even he is innocent when it comes to this one.
Another story that made me laugh concerned two young would be suicide bombers, during their court case a secretly made tape of the two was played and the conversation between the two was like a script from a bad comedy, the two would be killers seem to be two ten year old's playing a 'martyr game', the conversation between them went someting like this.."listen bro, on your (suicide) tape you gotta talk serious give it aggression you know, speak rhetoric innit, dont talk posh, use your normal voice that you speak" and "i left my (suicide) note out and de wife saw it an said 'is dat wot i fink it is?' so i told her jus shut your mouth innit" "naw bro what did i tell you, no paper. You got to put it all down on a laptop innit" as if it would never be found on a laptop. (i loved the use of 'innit').
Sadly i have lost the full transcripts of the tape but i do remember that the conversation that went between the two was more like young kids play acting for fun than a couple of determined murderers, one was a bus ticket inspector who was previously called something like COLIN until he canged it to OMAR ISLAM, the others name was much the same, it reminded me of when people called names like SEBASTION FALSWORTY used to rename themselves SID PUKE and such like.
I do have more to say but dont have the time to say it alas, but now that i am sun burnt and have to stay out of the sun for a day or three i will be back (thats a promise and not just a hollow threat) so, see you all soon, and i hope you enjoy JOHNNY MOPED and 'incendiry device' as much as i do (take it away slimy!)...............
P.S i have some gig news for this week so be sure to come back.